Interview with Gözde Duzer (vocals, theremin, bass guitar) from Aux Animaux
I saw the Darkwave artist AUX ANIMAUX live for the first time at the Stella Nomine Festival. Her impressive show immediately captivated me. Gözde Duzer has an incredible charisma, and her performance is full of energy, power and love for her audience. Her music shows influences from the 80s and a lot of inspiration from horror film music (a great passion of hers). What also makes her music so special and creates that unique magical effect is the theremin. Gözde uses it impressively in her show. It is the only instrument that is played without actually touching it.
In 2017, AUX ANIMAUX released her first EP, ‘Black Holes’. Further EPs followed, and she released her debut album, ‘Body Horror’, in 2023. Recently she published her new single ‘Demonizer’, in cooperation with DANCING PLAGUE. It is a very emotional, powerful song full of despair, but also liberation. In the interview, Gözde tells the story behind the song, her musical background and her own dark side.
Reflections of Darkness [RoD]: You recently released your new song ‘Demonizer’ together with DANCING PLAGUE. The song has an incredible power, it is very emotional and very strong. At the Stella Nomine Festival, you mentioned who it is dedicated to. Would you like to tell us something about the story behind the song?
Gözde: Sure! ‘Demonizer’ is a song about the terror I went through over a long period of time after a breakup due to a possessive, obsessive ex-partner who stalked, gaslighted, manipulated and demonized me for merely trying to move on with my life. Writing the song felt like an exorcism.
RoD: You have described AUX ANIMAUX as an “audiovisual project”. Your songs are all very emotional and very dark, which fits with the images in the videos, the album covers and your live shows. A big influence from the horror film genre is evident. How much of your own personality do you show in your performance? How much of Gözde is in AUX ANIMAUX? Is there a vulnerable side of yours behind the extreme façade?
Gözde: Personally, I think I am sincerely being myself own stage. There is no persona. Just me laid bare. My home is decorated that way too, old horror movie posters, and bones and candles. After all, life is a bit of a horror movie itself, isn’t it?
RoD: You also have experience as a bassist in a band. Is it more difficult to engage the audience on stage alone than with a band around you?
Gözde: It is definitely a different experience as everyone has their eyes on only me all the time. When you’re in a band you can relax a bit more I guess, but when you’re solo you have a lot more responsibility to give the audience a good show. But it’s easier to engage with the audience since they don’t have anyone else to look at.
RoD: On stage, you play bass and theremin, which gives your music a very special effect. How did you come to play the theremin?
Gözde: When I first started AUX ANIMAUX, I was nerding about synthesizers. I saw a video on YouTube where Dorit Chrysler was playing theremin and diverse Moog synths at Cern. I decided to get one, I learned how to play it and when I got good enough started to integrate it into my live shows.
RoD: You start your shows with a satanic ritual. Where did this inspiration come from and what does it mean to you?
Gözde: I’m a self-proclaimed satanist. Not in the sense that I believe in and worship Satan. But more of an atheist perspective. The school of satanism I identify with believes in enjoying and living life to the fullest, and not hurting anyone. At least in a nutshell. Lucifer means light bearer so it’s a metaphor for being open to knowledge and not going through life with horse goggles on.
RoD: You love horror films, as can be seen in your art - when did you first discover your dark side?
Gözde: I think first time I saw a horror movie was Friday the 13th when I was 9. After that I was hooked. I got really into it from my teens onward. Now I feel it’s an indispensable part of my life.
RoD: Did you grow up with music as a child? Did you play an instrument at a very young age and how important was music in your family and did it support your musicality?
Gözde: I played a bit of keyboards when I was a kid but the real journey started when I got my first guitar as a teenager. My father first let me borrow his old guitar and I had to earn him buying me my first guitar by showing consistency that I really wanted to play it. As an adult I found out I had a great uncle from my dad’s side that was a renounced jazz musician who played various brass instruments. He lived in Sweden too for a while of all places and played with the likes of Don Cherry (father of Neneh & Eagle Eye Cherry), and thought at Woodstock Jazz school. His name was Ismet Siral. Unfortunately, he committed suicide when I was 5, so I never got to know him.
RoD: The music you listen to as a teenager, when you might also be turning to a particular culture or “scene”, usually has a lasting impact on your life. What music influenced you in your youth?
Gözde: Partially grunge starting with NIRVANA. But also, Bristol sound, trip hop bands such as PORTISHEAD, MASSIVE ATTACK, TRICKY, etc. So, I don’t initially come from the goth scene.
RoD: Which concert you attended as a member of the audience has impressed you the most so far, and why?
Gözde: THE SOFT MOON every time! Luis’s drive, when he gave his all while feeling every emotion every show. He’s my biggest influence and will always be.
RoD: You moved from Turkey to Sweden a few years ago. What was the reason for that?
Gözde: I moved to Sweden from Turkey because I didn’t want to live in a mainly misogynistic culture. I toured all around Turkey for two years as a bass player before moving abroad and that made me decide I didn’t thrive in this culture that judged people’s but especially women’s every action. Sexual abuse was a part of daily life while merely walking on the street in Istanbul and I wanted to get out of that situation.
RoD: You are often on tour with SHE PAST AWAY and have known them for a long time. Almost all of their songs are in Turkish. Would you ever consider writing lyrics in Turkish or Swedish?
Gözde: No, I don’t feel comfortable expressing myself in those languages otherwise I would have done it by now. But I really enjoy being able to speak Turkish when I tour with SHE PAST AWAY or DUCTAPE. I hardly ever do it other than when I tour with them.
RoD: Is there a place where you've never performed live but would really like to play, and why?
Gözde: So many!!! I really want to play GRAUZONE FESTIVAL in the Netherlands, it’s been a dream for a few years. I definitely want to tour USA more and it would be fun to play Switzerland and Portugal sometime too. And maybe Japan.
RoD: So, I hope to see you soon again on stage - thank you very much for the interview!
https://auxanimaux.bandcamp.com/
All Pictures by Daniela Vorndran (http://www.vorndranphotography.com / http://www.facebook.com/blackcatnet)
